What to know prior to entering a Synagogue
The Sabbath Day
The Ten Commandments
Welcome to the Jew2u podcast.
Basically, if you are looking to return to Judaism this podcast is just for you. It's a starting point that will help you navigate the wide wide world of Judaism. I began my journey over 15 years ago and had lots of starts and stops. There are some things that you should know that will keep you from encountering too many turn-offs and keep you going on your journey. Last week I emphasized that Judaism is an extremely personal religion. You make it your own with the help of Rabbis, amazing books, and endless ethics and values. Go at your own speed.
In last week's first episode I explained what this podcast is all about and how it will affect your life for the positive. And if it does it will make everything on planet Earth better. If you haven't heard the first episode, take the time to listen to it as it's the most important episode in this series.
I promised that this week I would discuss the 10 Commandments and the Sabbath which I will. But before I do I want to explain a couple of other things.
The first step most people take when beginning their way back to Judaism is to go to a synagogue. Not a bad plan but if you don't know what “kind” of synagogue you are entering it can definitely be a big mistake, a huge turn-off, Judaism is not for me.
There are 3 main denominations of Judaism, Reform, Conservative, and Orthodaox and they all have subdivisions. Quickly stated: Reform services are 90% English 10% Hebrew, Conservative services are 50% English 50% Hebrew, and Orthodox services are 90% Hebrew 10% English. So if you walk into an Orthodox service you'll be totally lost. Walk into a Conservative service and you'll be halfway lost. The best place to start would be a Reform service. But there are some caveats to Reform denominations that you should know about.
You can easily do some research on Reform synagogues as all denominations have websites. Find out if it's a “Traditional” denomination as most Reform services contain a huge dose of left wing politics and the Traditional Reform service is less likely to be political. If Traditional is not mentioned on their website then expect a lot of politics. If left wing politics appeals to you go for it. If Traditional is mentioned it's a code word for English services with the emphasis on theology. Personally I don't go to synagogue to hear what I can read in the New York Times. Jewish theology, ethics, morals, and values is what I want to hear about. But you should try the Reform service just to become educated about the denomination. You might like it.
Conservative services also contain some politics and Orthodox services stay focussed totally on theology and all politics are frowned upon. Traditional Reform services are somewhat hard to find. If you can't find one and want to stay focussed on theology start with a Conservative denomination. As Judaism grows within you you'll realize that Jewish theology is way above and beyond political ideologies and isms.
Another way to vet Traditional vs Non-Traditional Reform is to see if their website makes mention of political issues like environmentalism, women's reproductive rights, LGBTQ issues, etc. A traditional Reform Temple won't make mention of these issues. Also if any of the Rabbis are female these issues are very likely to come up. I have no dog in this race, I'm just laying it out for you.
Probably the best place for you to start is if your local Orthodox temple has an Outreach program that meets once per week like a Friday or Saturday Shabbat service or weekly class. These outreach programs are usually all in English and you'll meet some very accomplished Rabbis. I know that Chabad is set up all over the place, in almost every town, and they all have outreach meetings. Chabad.org, that's .org, is also a really great website that is very informative and educational.
You probably don't know this but Judaism frowns upon proselytization, we don't go out looking for converts. You won't find Jews handing out pamphlets at the airport. Enter a synagogue and you'll be welcomed. In fact, most Rabbis are happy to see you and talk to you for a few minutes however they then turn their attention to their congregants and rightfully so. Every practicing Jew knows that Judaism requires a modicum of self-motivation which, ultimately, is a good thing. Please know that so you don't get turned off if a Rabbi doesn't beg you to return or spend an inordinate amount of time with you. The more you return to the services the more you will be expressing your own internal motivation.
So, what can you do today that will kickstart your return to Judaism. Last week I mentioned a book you can get on Amazon that is a fabulous place to start. If you haven't gotten it yet, buy it today. It's called The Indisputable Truth by Rabbi Aaron Golfez. That's Golf like the game and ez. He's young, enthusiastic and his writing is very clear and easy to read. Also buy two candle holders and a box of Shabbat candles and start lighting them every Friday night at sundown. You can find both the candle holders and candles at your local Judaica store or Kosher market. Buy them at those locations if you can as you will be keeping the money “in the family” so to speak.
You should know that the Jewish Day always begins at sundown on the day before so the Sabbath begins on Friday night and ends 25 hours later. It took me about a year to figure this out. I used to light Chanukah candles on the first “Day” and couldn't figure out why I was always a day late! Now you know so you won't make the same mistake. The first Day of Chanukah begins on the night before at sunset, not that day.
OK so here we go with what the Sabbath and the 10 Commandments mean to Jews. These explanations are brief but if all you do in your Jewish life is observe the Sabbath and do your best to live the 10 Commandments you will be a good, card carrying Jew!
When lighting Shabbat candles on Friday night you'll come to realize that you are psychically connecting with all other Jews of all denominations up and down your time zone as they are also lighting candles, honoring the 4th of the 10 Commandments just like you. You should learn the Shabbat prayer as you light the candles. It's just three short sentences easy to learn and available everywhere, phonetically, on the internet in Hebrew. Chabad.org has it for sure.
Saying the prayer is not a big deal. You will take pride in this psychic connection with your tribe members. By the way, this ritual is reserved for females but if there are no females in the house it's perfectly fine for males to observe this Shabbat tradition.
Now, what a purest does on a Sabbath Day will definitely be different than what you will do. It's important that you simply make your Sabbath Day a “different” day than the other 6 days. According to the Orthodox you're not supposed to drive, handle money, cook food, light lights, do any business either in reality or in your head. It's a day of complete rest, a day to be with family and friends.
But the Orthodox are purists and you can create a Sabbath of your own especially as a jewish newbie, or jewbie. I had a Traditional Reform Rabbi invite me out for a round of Golf on Saturday. The Orthodox would not consider that an appropriate Sabbath activity. It's OK. Drive to the course and play golf with your Rabbi and/or friends. Don't talk business. Be leisurely, see Hashem in the beautiful landscaping, have fun.
As a defining part of Judaism is that it's very personal, you can do as little or as much jewish ritual as you want. But don't be surprised that the more rituals you do will inspire you to do more rituals.
The Sabbath changes you. I eat a lot, sleep a lot, and read a lot. I use cruise control in my car right at the speed limit where I'm usually driving 5 miles over the speed limit on other days. Cars go whizzing past me and I don't care. Many more pious jews would say I'm not really doing the Sabbath correctly and I acknowledge that they have a right to their opinion. But for me my Sabbath Day is definitely different and that's all that matters. As I grow in my piety I will slowly become more of a purest.
This I do know: Hashem values the effort more than the accuracy of the ritual, especially for jewbies. Hashemdoesn’t measure your observance level so much as your effort level, and also your capacity to do good. Making the effort to add Jewish rituals into your life increases that capacity.
Here's a little story about how adding jewish rituals into your life changes you. I met a secular non-religious jewish woman in her 30's at the dog park who was obviously pretty desperate to marry and have a family. She was dating a non-jewish man and we had a discussion about how she would raise her children if she married him. She said she'd raise them both Jewish and Christian. I asked her if she felt that might be confusing for the children and she responded that it might but she couldn't find any eligible Jewish men to get serious with.
So I bought her two candle holders and a box of candles and she was surprisingly appreciative. I was shocked that she immediately started lighting the candles every Friday night. I was even more surprised when she told me she was taking a class on Kabbalah which, if you don't know is Jewish mysticism.
Kabbala is not in my wheelhouse but, like I say, Judaism is very, very personal and she absolutely loved the classes. She moved away to a different dog park but the last I heard from her she was seriously dating her old Jewish boyfriend from High School. So I guess a little bit of jewish ritual certainly changed the direction of her life for the better!
Just as a quick aside I just mentioned Kabbalah as her path into the study of Judaism. My path is Pirkei Avot. There are many other paths like Chassidim, Mussar, Mishna, Gemara, and more. All are compilations of adages, ethics, and values written by the most intellectual of our forefathers. You will find what suits you best. When you study ethics you can't help but absorb them into your life, and as you refine your own actions in the world it makes the world a better place. That's the goal of Judaism and that's when you know you are a Jew.
But as a jewbie you can forget all of this. Being a Jew simply means knowing and living by the 10 Commandments. It's really that simple. Not! When you study them you'll discover that there really are many fine lines of distinction, nuances, to all of them. However, YOU CAN DO IT!
Most secular non-religious jews like you can't name them all. If you get 7 or 8 that's pretty good. When I started I could only name 6 of them. Learning to name them all, in the proper Jewish order, is just the start. You can study the 10 Commandments forever and still not completely know them.
For instance, the Commandment “Do not steal” sounds pretty easy. But take a case like going into a Best Buy store and shop for a TV. Then if you go home and buy that TV on the internet you are stealing. How? You've stolen the time of the salesman. Do you think Best Buy is there as a showroom for internet vendors? Obviously it's not! That whole scenario makes the world a worse place to live in. Your action and the actions of others doing the same thing might cause Best Buy to close some or all of it's stores.
Do you take sugar packets from restaurant tables? That's stealing. Don't do it! So you see you can study and dissect each of the 10 Commandments in the same way. But when you study them it makes you ethically a much better person and as I said in last weeks episode the whole thing about Judaism is to DO GOOD which makes the world a better place. Every mundane action you make draws Hashem down into the world.
So now we've taken care of the 4thSabbath and 8th Stealing Commandments let's go to number 5: Honor your mother and father. This means that you don't necessarily have to LOVE them. Just honor them. Make sure that at the very least they have a roof over their heads, clothing on their backs, and food in their belly. But as usual the Commandment doesn't only mean that. It also means to honor all authority figures like police, doctors, nurses, military, etc. Be respectful. When authority figures are disrespected the world becomes a worse place.
Number 6 is DO NOT MURDER. It doesn't say Do Not Kill. Hebrew has two different words for kill and murder. The Jewish 10 Commandments uses the word for Murder. You are permitted to use lethal force if someone is coming after you to harm you. Life is sacred, repeatedly stated in the Torah, and if you have to kill to protect yourself and others than you can kill to protect. In fact, the only time it is permissible for a Jew to lie is to save a life.
Do not commit Adultery is number 7. This hurts 4 people. The two adulterers and their two spouses and if divorces ensue it hurts all of the offspring.
Do not lie is number 9. I had someone tell me they only tell small “white” lies. Oh yeah right. You only tell small lies and you want me to believe that if it's a big issue you won't lie? I know you will. There are no qualifications to the size of the truth. Don't tell any lies. It will enhance your life. If it's uncomfortable, deal with it.
Number 10 is Do Not Covet. When you chase after what other people have you are creating incredible emotional strain on yourself. Live your life. Not someone else's life. Enjoy what Hashem has provided for you. Your emotional strain does not make the world a better place.
Commandments 3, 2, 1 are Don't take the name of the Lord in vain, Don't make or follow idols, The Jewish God is the one and only.
Saying, “damn it, I struck out,” is not taking the name of the Lord in vain. Saying “Allahu Akbar” just prior to slitting someones throat IS taking the name of the Lord in vain.
Idols are not just statues of Buddha and others. Idols are also money, fame, power, beauty, longevity and other worldly pursuits that ultimately mean nothing. You can achieve success but do so without an addiction to it.
The Jewish God as the one and only was extremely radical when introduced by Abraham 3 thousand years ago because at the time there were over 50,000 gods. And today it's even more radical because the jews worship a god that is neither physical nor part of time. That's a difficult concept to grasp, but nevertheless true.
Now you've heard them all. So I ask you, are there any Commandments you would remove? Are there any Commandments you would add? Jewish scholars have debated these two questions for a few thousand years and they've concluded that the 10 Commandments pretty much covers everything. Now it's up to you to try to live up to them, to join a tribe, unique in the world in it's own way, in bringing the world into a better place. My two sentence explanations are extremely simplified. But that's Jewish thought for you. Every question between two jews always has at least three answers and all the answers lead to a better world.
I consider myself a Torah-believing, non-observant Jew. I do many Jewish rituals and study Torah every day. I don't keep Kosher, drive on the Sabbath, and don't pray three times per day. But I do know that with every daily mundane action I'm making the world a better place. You also are non-observant but you don't believe in the Torah or you would be studying it. So you are living a life that most of the time does not make the world a better place.
Studying Torah does not necessarily mean reading the Torah itself. Reading a book on the 10 Commandments, or on Abraham, or on Moses, etc, IS studying Torah.
Next week I'll be discussing “The Pit” which is currently where you live. Judaism is your path out of the pit. The Tribe is waiting for you but you're the one who has to go for it. Why not go for it now?!
Shalom!
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